Benedictine Nuns – Page 4 – Abbey of St. Walburga

Eyes on the Prize

March 24, 2020

A reflection by Mother Maria-Michael Newe, OSB

I think one of the keys to a meaningful life is to remember things that are eternal. St. Benedict talks about this in his Rule. In the Prologue he exhorts us to “keep your eyes on eternity,” and in Chapter 72 he writes, “let them prefer nothing whatever to Christ, and may he bring us all together to everlasting life.” St. Benedict loves that everlasting life. He wants us to keep it in our minds, a constant reminder of our ultimate goal. And remember that eternity with God is the place where we are fully ourselves, completely healed from our wounds, and able to love God and each other freely and perfectly. That is the kingdom we want to come to earth as it is in heaven!

What is your goal? If you’re trying to drive in a straight line you have to keep your focus on a single point in the distance. If you don’t, you’ll end up like me the time I was driving a tractor and I looked up to see a huge bird that flew overhead. You should have seen the swerve in the field. I had to continually go back to try and straighten it up and compensate here and there to try to make it look nice. But there’s more to it than that when it comes to our souls. If we aren’t focused, the swerve can be detrimental. It’s not something you can fix without God’s help or without setting your sight purposefully.

We do our part by living our lives well. Through our prayer and the purity of our life, God can take those things and use them where He wills. It is a mystery—we do not need to understand how He does it—the purpose is to believe. I don’t need to know exactly how, nor does He need my permission. It is only my “yes” that is necessary. Mary didn’t understand everything about the Incarnation or Crucifixion of her Son. She did not ask, “Can I see a book on how to do all of this? Can I see an instruction manual before getting back to You?” There was none of that. There was just pure faith.

Of course there will be times that we mess up, take our eyes off our goal, and refuse the calls to conversion and healing that are meant to lead us to becoming truly ourselves. This is what it means to be human! God does not expect anything different from us. I love the saying that “saints are sinners that kept on trying.” The important part is whether or not we persevere in returning to God whenever our conscience informs us of our wrongdoing. Look at King David. He sinned royally—committing adultery, murder, and who knows what else—but when we read in 1 Kings 11 how David was remembered, we don’t hear about his failures, but only that his heart was “entirely with the Lord,” and that he followed God “unreservedly.” David committed a terrible crime, but he never despaired of God’s love for him and His forgiveness toward those who turn to Him as truly remorseful children. Let us also never despair of God’s mercy.

Illumination of St. Benedict by a nun of the Abtei St. Walburg in Eichstätt, Germany

Honoring Our Patroness

March 9, 2020

On February 25 the Church honors the life of Saint Walburga, our community’s patroness. Here we are processing in to Vespers on that day, a day of great celebration in our house.

God our Father,
the life and deeds of St. Walburga are resplendent with your glory.
As we join with her in worship before your throne, grant that our prayer may effect healing and comfort for all those who seek her aid.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
Liturgical Prayer for the Solemnity of St. Walburga

A Lesson from King David

February 29, 2020

“He has raised up a horn for our salvation within the house of David his servant”
Luke 1:69

A reflection on the King David of the Old Testament by Mother Maria-Michael Newe, OSB

David could be a really controversial character because of some of the things he did in his life. He had a sword…and he wasn’t afraid to use it. God even told him that he couldn’t build His temple because he had too much blood on his hands. And then there’s the whole episode with Bathsheba—committing adultery and then murder to cover up his crime. But there’s one thing about David that keeps drawing the heart of the Lord, and that’s his humility. David is a humble man, and he acknowledges his wrongdoings. When he is corrected, he does not try to defend himself. We never hear of him coming back to God and saying, “Well let me explain myself!”. Never. He always takes total blame, begging God to blame himself, the shepherd, and not his sheep. He is so honest and generous in that way; and God looks upon that and seems to forget everything else.

I also love David because of his prayer. I think it must have taken him even more courage to pray after getting into so much trouble. He keeps going back to God, without any sense that he should do otherwise. We can learn something from that. David, even after the crimes he committed, continues to sing the psalms, to play on his harp, and he continues to love. He accepts who he is; he doesn’t try to weasel out of what he’s done. Perhaps by accepting his shortcomings, he calls upon God to love him more, because he acknowledges that he needs Him more. We should do the same.

You can think about that this Lent. It is a good practice to simply say nothing when corrected for a fault, but humbly acknowledge it and turn to the Lord for His mercy. I think St. Benedict strove for that too, that pure heart, to be of the house of David.

Bowing for the Doxology during the Divine Office

“We ponder, O God, your mercy
within your temple”
Psalm 48:10

Free to Serve

February 24, 2020

A reflection on the Gospel reading for the fourth Thursday in Ordinary Time (Mark 6:7-13) by Mother Maria-Michael Newe, OSB

The 94-year-old hands of our Sister Augustina, who was a beautiful example of someone always ready to serve

Today in the Gospel reading, Jesus summoned the twelve apostles and sent them out two by two, giving them authority to drive out unclean spirits. When He describes what they should take with them, notice that it is very little. Basically He told them not to bring anything extra: not a second tunic, and no more than sandals they were wearing on their feet. They had everything that was needed for their immediate use, and not more. It seems that the point was to have no distractions from the things they were carrying with them. This is certainly part of the monastic life: not to have so much that it’s a distraction. We have distractions all the time (even without lots of possessions), so keeping things simple minimizes the distractions so we’re not worrying about “stuff.” Plus, the more you have, the more you have to clean!

We also hear that Jesus warns the apostles that they will not be welcomed everywhere they go. That doesn’t seem to distress them. Christ tells them to shake the dust off their feet and walk right on. In the same way, don’t be stressed about the blocks that come in front of you. God doesn’t suggest that we stare at them until we understand them, or tear them apart until we see the seed of everything. Kick the dust off your feet and walk right on. Don’t let things hinder you from your vocation. Be free to do His will. Freely. That is what a true spouse does—freely serves.

There’s a prayer I like to pray, and here’s just a part of it: “To carry my cross after Him all the days of my life, and to be more faithful to Him than I have ever been before.” It has a touch of a wedding vow. That’s a beautiful way to begin each day. Regardless of yesterday, I have today to live for Him.

Is He not the most beautiful in your life? That perception of Him is what will motivate you to live faithfully. Your eyes shouldn’t want to land on anybody else. He is enough. But that takes a lot of practice, a lot of perseverance, and a lot of forgiveness, because we’re human and we’re going to mess up once in a while. But that doesn’t mean we can’t do it. With the desire to be faithful, there is also the grace to persevere. And we should just be excited that that’s what we have been called to do.

The Close of Calving Season

February 24, 2020

With 43 calves down and only one to go, our calving season is almost over! The only scare we had was a premature calf born in the middle of the night, which we found in the morning fighting for his life. Thankfully, after nursing him back to health in our barn for a couple days he is now running with the rest of them and rapidly catching up in size, too.

Fig Tree Poetry and Paintings

February 15, 2020

Oil painting by Mother Maria-Thomas for the cover of her book *Reveries Under the Fig Tree: Volume I* — Reflections for the Advent and Christmas Season

Mother Maria-Thomas wrote the following poem to accompany the first volume of her Reveries Under the Fig Tree, in which alludes to the theme she chose for her books: the encounter between Nathaniel and Jesus as described in John 1:45-51. In this passage we hear Christ telling Nathaniel that he saw him under the fig tree before he was called by Philip, which mysteriously led to Nathaniel’s immediate belief in Jesus as truly being the “Son of God” and “King of Israel.”

Our God is Coming

We don’t know what Nathanael saw that night
under his fig tree in the dark winter’s skies.
Was it a dream like Jacob had on his flight?
A vision of angels soaring up to the heights
carrying with them his prayers and tears,
bringing back God’s assuring promise of light
and protection which put an end to his fears?

Or did the Messiah appear to Nathanael,
as he once did to the young Prophet Daniel
who saw the Son of Man coming as Ruler of nations?
At the end of all time from heaven he’ll descend
as Savior and Judge from the Father’s right hand,
Offering all mankind God’s new-born creation:
Pure oceans, fresh air, and in spring-bloom the world;
in fire all hearts then cleansed from transgressions.

Look at that star over Bethlehem:
It seems to announce the place of his birth,
As Balaam foresaw in the Hebrew story:
The Magi set out from the ends of the earth,
to worship the King, precious presents they bring.
In vain did they seek him in palaces’ wealth.
They found him at last in a cold, dripping cave
on his mother’s lap while angels would sing
of peace to all people and to God alone glory.

No witness we have of that reverie
which only Nathanael himself could know.
But so far he kept it in tight secrecy
hiding this vision from his fellows below.

Now here comes this Rabbi from Nazareth,
a small unknown city of dubious fame.
The Messiah this man cannot possibly be,
as some of his followers boldly proclaim.
But his eyes pierce deep into my innermost heart:
All my doubts, my desires he seems to see
He must be the Messiah, the Son of God.

Oil painting by Mother Maria-Thomas for the cover of her book *Reveries Under the Fig Tree: Volume II* — Reflections for the Lent and Easter Season

Below is the poem she wrote for the second volume of her Reveries Under the Fig Tree:

The Phoenix

We don’t know what Nathanael dreamed that night
under his fig tree in early spr
Was it the same dream that Jacob, in flight,
saw of the angels on a ladder to God
carrying up his desires and fears,
and in turn God’s assuring response did bring?

Or did the Messiah appear to Nathanael
ready to free from the tight Roman yoke
his ancestral heritage, the land Israel
still held in bondage despite attempts of revolt?

Or was it more like a vision? Who knows?
An appearance like that to Ezekiel
who witnessed the throng of dead-stricken bones,
arising to life by the fresh Spirit’s breath
from the rubble of ashes, of fire and death?

Or did he see “Phoenix” in jubilant blaze
ascending to God out of Calvary’s grave?
taking dead humankind to God’s living face?

No witness we have of that reverie
which only the dreamer himself could know.
But he kept it so far in tight secrecy
hiding this mystery from his fellows below.

Now here comes this Rabbi from Nazareth
who beholds the deep secrets of all human hearts.
He must be the Messiah, Israel’s King
who, arising to glory from torment and death,
to all waiting souls God’s salvation will bring.

Reveries Under the Fig Tree: Book Promotion

February 12, 2020

Mother Maria-Thomas holding her *Reveries*

Mother Maria-Thomas Beil, OSB, has recently released two new books: Reveries Under the Fig Tree Volume I – Reflections for the Advent and Christmas Season, and Reveries Under the Fig Tree Volume II – Reflections for the Lent and Easter Season. They are compilations of the letters she sent out to our Oblates when she was Oblate Director (from the year she retired from serving as Abbess in 2003 until 2012), in addition to various supplemental reflections and conferences given to the community. Her insights constitute an invaluable resource for spiritual meditation. To accompany her literary work she composed beautiful oil paintings, which are featured on their covers. A third and final volume will be released for the Summer and Fall Seasons, with a special emphasis on Oblate formation and Final Oblation.

Click here to visit our Gift Shop page where you can purchase Mother Maria-Thomas’ books.

To learn more about our Oblate Program, visit our Oblate Page.

Abbey News has Moved!

February 12, 2020

Watercolor painting of our Abbey by Mother Maria-Thomas

New in 2020: Our Abbey News blog page has moved to WordPress!

The Blessing of Misery

January 31, 2020

A reflection on the first Mass reading for the first Tuesday in Ordinary Time (1 Samuel 1:9-20) by Mother Maria-Michael Newe, OSB

In the beautiful story about Hannah, we hear that “in her bitterness she prayed to the Lord, weeping copiously” (1 Sam 1:10). St. Benedict also says that we should weep in our prayer. This weeping happens when we allow something to touch us deeply. Now think of how Hannah could even be grateful for Peninnah (who rubbed Hannah’s barrenness in her face) because she brought her to a deeper prayer. In her bitterness Hannah did not turn away from God; she turned toward God.

We all have our moments of bitterness, of pain, and of sorrow, but the important part is what we do with them. These moments can be the greatest graces in our lives. They can be the things that push us in the right direction. So God allows them. He says, “Yes, this is actually going to be for your good…”

When we hear Hannah saying later in her prayer, “if you remember me, and do not forget me,” we seem to hear her greatest sorrow—that God has forgotten her. It seems that He has remembered Peninnah over and over again, since she had many children, and which seems to prove to Hannah that God has forgotten her. She is noticed by Eli, the temple priest, praying in an unknown way, and Eli judges her. He assumes that she’s drunk, but he takes it back after she explains her situation. Thank God for her humility. She didn’t mind being humble and telling him that she is just a very unhappy woman. She doesn’t lash out at him, she doesn’t scream at him or push him down. Instead she tells him that her prayer is prompted by her deep sorrow and misery.

I think it is simply because of the Lord’s great love for us that He allows us such sorrows. He just wants us to come to Him. And if we won’t come to Him simply, it seems He will allow greater things to happen that will force us to come to Him—because what He really wants is that relationship. So whatever will bring that about, God allows. And He can use any means. Harsh words or the feeling of being judged or unaccepted, God will use for our good. So instead of being upset, we should thank Him. Thank Him that He allowed that thing to happen because it leads us to a greater good, to Him. And then it changes how we see it; instead of being a point sorrow it becomes a point of joy.

Remember that evil only wants to take from God what He loves. So whatever can take you away from prayer, however little it may be, will be used by evil. At the same time, though, anything that brings us back to God is a tool for good. That’s a hard lesson to learn, because we usually want to blame somebody for our sorrows. Blaming someone else so much easier than acknowledging that we weren’t doing what we were supposed to be doing, or we weren’t reaching deeper into God. We look for someone else to blame so that we aren’t blamed. The minute we can start changing that, we’ve changed our lives—we’ve changed our attitude. What a blessing. And so it was with Hannah. Eli blesses her, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.” Let’s wish that for one another. Let’s give that blessing. Go in peace, and may the God if Israel grant you what you have asked of Him. That is my prayer for you today.

On Eagles’ Wings

January 22, 2020

A reflection on Isaiah 40:25-31 by Mother Maria-Michael Newe, OSB

In Isaiah we hear, “He leads out their army and numbers them, calling them all by name” (Isaiah 40:26). I have a hard time with names, so if anybody can call an army, each one by name, that is a miracle. But that’s how personal God is. Nothing is by chance. We cannot fathom to what detail He takes care of our lives. Everybody has free will because God gives it, and sometimes we use it to our own detriment. But God desires to bring good out of the darkest situations.

The reading continues, “Why O Jacob, do you say, and declare, O Israel, ‘my way is hidden from the Lord’?” (Isaiah 40:27). No, it’s not. Who would believe that his way is hidden from the Lord? It astonishes me when people have the mentality that “God doesn’t know about this,” or “that won’t matter to Him,” and to make it less that it really is. We should not minimize our actions. The Church needs our holiness. We should never say, “The Lord doesn’t mind,” because the Lord does mind, and we should mind too.

Later on in Isaiah it says, “they who hope in the Lord will renew their strength, they will soar as with eagles’ wings” (Isaiah 40:31a). To soar as with eagles’ wings—could that not also mean to take that Word of God and let our souls soar to reach Him? Have you ever seen an eagle soar? They’re not flapping around; they’re just resting on the wind. Take His Word and rest in His Word. It has the power to heal, to restore the soul. “They will run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint” (Isaiah 40:31b). God’s Word gives that power.

“And the Word became flesh, and made his dwelling among us.”
John 1:14